Dandelions.

I have many in my yard right now. I've been pulling them this weekend. It rained, so their usually stubborn taproots are coming out. I mentioned pulling them to FBE.

Then I remembered that I have told men in the past that they are the perfect symbold of love. And that if they truly loved me that they would get over the standard acceptable gifts & flowers & they would be brave enough to give me dandelions... plus if they pulled them from my yard, it would certainly be helpful to my landscaping attempts.

When asked to explain why they are symbolic of true love, this is what I say:

They are adaptable. They are indestructible. Yes, when picked/abused the blossoms can wilt very quickly, just like the giddiness of "in love", but the underlying plant continues to grow anyway. The tap root runs deep into the core of the earth. Like love's roots go deep into our core. The blossoms are full of light & are happy looking. Love makes us shine & be happy. The seed heads allow us to have fun & be silly when blowing them. Love spreads like the seeds when joy is present. Meanwhile, the leaves can give you sustenance when you are hungry & from the plant you can also get a tea full of vitamin c & supposedly also a wine. Love can get us through hardships. It's a versatile little plant. And love should be too. It's a good plant to have at your side, just like love.

But I still don't want them in my yard, or my salad.
FBE told his wife that he wants a divorce. She's not happy. She wants time to work things out. He says he's telling her no. He's given it time over & over again & he is done. She has asked if there is some one else twice now. The first time last week he said, No, that's not why he's getting a divorce, but that he's not going to sit around once the divorce is final. I told him that he basically told her with that "but" part that there actually is someone in the wings waiting. The second time which was today he said, Maybe, he doesn't know for certain yet. When asked if he had feelings for some one else, he said, Maybe, he wasn't sure what there was. But that he decided on the divorce before the maybe came around.

Meanwhile... the maybe on my side is dissipating fast. From what he says to me, its dissipating fast on his side too, but since he wanted the divorce before Labor Day weekend, then she needs to know that the divorce is about her & him... not me & him. I agree that everything would be messier if she thinks there is a him & me. I wish that he hadn't admitted to her that a "maybe" exists for that reason, but I really like his honesty.

And though we talk a lot (about 15 hours worth) & e-mail a lot (around 100), & we are tempted to wonder if we have something that will survive & last... there are things we won't know until we actually spend physical time with each other. & I don't mean time being physical sexually, but I do mean being near pheromes. PLUS, watching each other move, our facial expressions, the way we act around each other in public, seeing what ticks us off. Do we get road rage, just annoyed, or go with the flow? Do we walk with pride, self loathing or arrogance? Talking on the phone, helps some, but it's not the same. ...but I now love cell phones & really appreciate that we have the same company so all of our minutes/hours are FREE.

I wonder if he still wears Brut. I've thought of him everytime I've smelled it during the last 25 years... even when my husband wore it. I don't associate the smell with the ex. I associate it with FBE; it is his face & body I remember when I smell it. NO, I don't know what 1/2 of his body looks like. I've only seen him shirtless. He never even wore summer shorts in my presence.... but I can imagine.

Uh, time to stop this nonsense.

May you enjoy the company of those you come into contact with physically, emotionally or electronically.

Take care,

Pete